Wednesday, July 31, 2013
I've struggled with weight since my mid-twenties...I used to be able to eat a whole medium pizza at a time, and be fine... Right before I got pregnant with my son, I weighed in at 140 lbs at the fertility clinic (a whole other story) , yet at that point, I was ok with my body and my weight ( I am 5'2", so that was a lot of weight for me...) I was a size 6 and wore it nicely. I gained a lot of weight when I was pregnant (I was up to 164 lbs...I blame my gestational diabetes...and the fact that I was carrying around an almost 10 lb baby!), and was back down to 140 6 weeks post partum.
After my son was born, I was on top of the world...I was instantly in love with HIM and in love with being a mom... I suffered from post partum anxiety, which was terrible, but I lived through it.
My marriage started to downward spiral not long after...I don't know exactly what went wrong, just that I wasn't happy anymore. I was at my heaviest at that point; I don't even know how much...Sadly, we split up. He moved out, and I stayed in the house with N (my son, about 17 months old at the time...). The weight started falling off me almost instantly. I got down to a gross 106 lbs, and I looked deathly. At the time I thought I looked fine, but looking back now, I think I looked sick. That was in 2008. Fast forward to 2012 and I am back up to 139 lbs :( . That's the sucky part about getting comfortable in a relationship...with me anyway. I get too comfy and let my guard down, and I stop caring about what I look like :( .
I was on my to becoming very sad with my life , everything in it except for my precious boy! He kept me going :) It was a conversation on the phone that I had with my mom that changed everything around for me. She told me flat out I was getting fat. And with my diabetes history, that I was asking for it. She was brutally honest with me, saying that my appearance was probably the reason people weren't accepting my available daycare spot (I was interviewing for one vacant spot at the time). Yep, she was brutal. But I knew deep down inside she was RIGHT. So, that got my ball rolling. Lots of tears...I worked on it for a while just simply through eating (what I thought was ) better, and lost a bit. But then the holidays came, and a little crept back on. It wasn't until April of 2013 that I really got a grip, started eating really clean (spinach and avocado, lots of fruit and veggies and almost no carbs), and doing exercise! I pushed 5 kids in a huge buggy around the neighbourhood every morning, and then took a powerwalk every evening after N went to bed. ...Fast forward to today, and I am 110 lbs, with nice muscle.. (ie I don't look sick!) I feel great! I have tonnes of energy, and it's so nice to fit into a size 1 again! Sometimes I fall off the wagon, and then feel like crap...but all in all, I totally plan to live this way for the rest of my life. I am glad my mom gave me the push I needed, and was probably looking for.
This was me June 2012 at N's Kindergarten grad
30 lbs lighter (I love selfies!)
Here's a body shot, just to get the full effect
Lots of veggies, fruit and water really do a body good!
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